Farewell Christian Nade: our man of the season

We've seen the last of Christian Nade in a Hearts shirt, and while the Jambos are by and large glad to get rid, boy are we gonna miss him.

Nade spent three years in Scottish football, and was laughed at by fans and derided in the press for much of that time. But in so many ways, the big man sums up the current state of Scottish football in 2010.

His arrival from Sheffield United in summer 2007 was yet another example of the insanity of the Hearts regime. Vladimir Romanov sanctioned a transfee fee of £500,000 and a weekly wage of around £10k a week - and it quickly transpired that, yet again, another big-money signing had gone badly wrong.

(If you think only Hearts are prone to this kind of folly, just remember the £2m Celtic blew on Robbie Keane this season to achieve absolutely sweet fuck all.)

Frequently injured, when Nade did play he looked desperately unfit - he may be French, but he's the very embodiment of Scotland's attitude towards exercise.

According to Sky, his manager at the Blades, Neil Warnock, expressed an interest in taking him back to Crystal Palace in 2008 - but for whatever reason, that transfer didn't happen, and Nade stayed at Tynecastle for the duration of his contract.

Unsettled and unhappy (and rumoured to be seeking solace in online, er, chat), Nade entered this season a mess, but at a press conference in October claimed to be putting his problems behind him.

Note that even the BBC can't resist a pun about the man's weight. And note also that Nade comes across as a genuinely open and likeable guy.

There was even, despite his miserable lack of goals (he scored 10 in total for Hearts in three years), talk of a new contract.

Because here's the other thing about Christian Nade - out-of-shape and unfashionable he may be, but, like Scottish football itself, he's nowhere near as bad as his biggest critics make out. He's got genuine technical ability, and a game awareness that enables him to hold the ball up and bring team mates into play. There were some signs that, after Csaba Laszlo's deathly dull rigidity, more positive tactics might bring the best out of him.

Sadly, though, those personality frailities caught up with him once again. Getting sent off against Rangers on 23 January didn't help his cause, but then after playing Celtic, he got into an argument with Ian Black and did what many right-thinking people would do - he punched the little tosser.

The Hearts hierachy then suspended him, and then told him he had no future at the club.

He provided more copy for the papers a few days later, after arranging to play a five-a-side match with some random punters through Facebook. It seemed he was just lonely and wanted some company.

Nade claims that he did in fact sign a new contract before the argument with Ian Black, but the fact that he does not have a signed copy is unlikely to help his case. However, he has certainly helped to shine a little more light on the bizarre way Hearts is run. Although initially reluctant to sign, he claims he didn't want to say so because the club would just drop him, as they did Jose Goncalves.

So what next for our hero? He's still only in his mid-20s, so should have many more years ahead of him as a professional player. But he would need to sort his head out, and become a dedicated athlete - and Scotland probably isn't the place to do that. He also seems to be someone who needs an arm put around him, so he can feel secure and confident. At Hearts the players simply don't get that.

Whatever happens, we wish him all the best. Scottish football is going to be a slightly duller place without him

Rangers are the runts of the "easy" group

When the draw for this season's Champions League group stages were announced, the Daily Record pronounced Group G - which Rangers were in - as the "Group of Dull".

Yep, Sevilla, Stuttgart and Unirea Urziceni were all boring, you see, so Rangers would qualify from the group. New chairman Alistair Johnston said as much:

"We go into this campaign feeling, quite rightly, as if we have a realistic chance of making the last 16."

Rangers have fallen so far short that it's barely worth asking where it went wrong. Conceding 10 goals at home - while only scoring 2 - is not down to poor tactics or choosing the wrong personnel, but rather a team hopelessly ill-equipped for the competition.

Having missed out on the Europa League, too, Rangers can now stop heaping further embarassment on Scottish football in Europe and "concentrate on domestic duties", as the old saying goes.

Good. This has been a miserable adventure. The sooner it is forgotten by everyone, the better.

Laszlo and Mowbray move closer to the exit

Another thrilling weekend in the SPL, with much to discuss.

Let's start in Edinburgh, where a seismic event - a goal from Christian Nade (a belter it was too) - couldn't prevent Hearts slumping to defeat against St Johnstone.

After the match, Csaba Laszlo once again seemed to be asking for the sack, although his long-winded manner can disguise criticism under a barrage of chatter. But he wants to "talk to the board", and is clearly complaining about the lack of quality in the squad. Will he walk if he doesn't get support in January?

Hibs were away in Paisley at the weekend, and came back with a point they probably didn't deserve. Is this a team capable of getting results even when playing poorly, or a team that just isn't anywhere near consistent enough to make either of the Old Firm look over their shoulders? Holding onto third is probably the extent of Hibs' league ambition this season.

Motherwell and Aberdeen played out an entertaining, admirably footballing draw, the match given added spice by McGhee's public courting of Jim O'Brien.

Rangers dismissed Kilmarnock and Falkirk got their first win of the season against Hamilton, compressing the bottom of the table even further. With Hearts and Killie both right in it, things could get very tasty indeed down there.

And finally to Tannadice, where Tony Mowbray's grip on the Celtic job seems to be getting more and more tenuous by the week. He's tried criticising his defence, he's dropped different centre-backs to the bench, and nothing's worked. Now, he has tried to defend his team by claiming that, despite losing to the Arabs, there was a "gulf in quality".

Fine, but defending like that will not win the title. Celtic handed Utd the equaliser on a plate, by failing to mark Jon Daly, and the marking was poor for the winner, too.

Unless Mowbray understands that he has to address basics like this, the supporters will become ever more restless over the coming months.

Highlights, as always, on the BBC.

Won't somebody please buy Rangers?

"Before accepting the role of chairman, I wanted to speak to three constituencies - the board, the management team, and the bank."

So began Alastair Johnston, in his first press conference after succeeding David Murray as Chairman of Rangers Football Club. In case anyone missed the point, he then went on to mention Rangers' reliance on "external funding" several times, leaving no doubt as to the club's biggest problem - the debt owed to the bank, which is estimated at around £25-30m. RFC are skint.

Johnston's plan to alleviate this debt burden is to renergise attempts to find a buyer for the club. How does he plan to achieve this, given that the club has been for sale for years without any serious bidders becoming public? Well, he thinks that the football landscape is changing, and he intends for Rangers to be at the forefront of that change. Given his involvement with IMG, the global marketing company, you can bet that Johnston will be pushing hard for new media-driven opportunities that will somehow include Rangers at the top table.

The press conference is well worth a watch. Downbeat and matter-of-fact, Johnston only becomes passionate later on (around the 16 minute mark on the BBC clip) when discussing potential new opportunities from media companies - ie TV. Rangers seem to be betting that they can escape the "modest revenues" of the SPL and join some sort of pan-European elite. In Johnston's words, "money talks".

Last night's game against Sevilla showed how far the present team is away from the current top European teams, while in the SPL Rangers have just stopped scoring goals. Not only is the squad in poor shape, Johnston can't promise any reinforcements in January, and Walter Smith's contract (which is also up in the new year) is still unresolved.

So even if he is right about a new, TV-driven structure for football that will enable Rangers to achieve parity with the wealthiest clubs in Europe, Johnston has short term issues to address. Unless some generous benefactor appears out of nowhere soon, expect a lot more pain at Ibrox in the coming months.